Review: Chick-fil-A Hapeville Dwarf House – Hapeville, GA

We ventured into this, the very first Chick-fil-A, while trying to kill some time before our flight at Jackson-Hartsfield International.  Imagine something between a Chik Fil-A and a Denny’s with weird dwarf theming. If you can set your expectations to that level you’ll do fine. The budget-minded gourmand might indulge in the “Hot Brown,” a breakfast food item you can eat. I ordered a plate with two sides that came in plastic containers fresh from the microwave. Now thems good eats. Still, if you’re inmeshed in Chik Fil-A lore you know the significance of this holy site, and will rebuff any criticisms of the quality of the food or its presentation to the consumer. There is nothing I can do to stop you, is there?

**

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Review: DoReMi Karaoke – Atlanta, GA

Fine karaoke rooms and good service, but you do sometimes need to track down the staff to get what you need. Be aware this is a Korean karaoke joint so almost all the the materials are in Korean, and their song library is 80% Korean songs. Still plenty to keep English speakers singing for hours; not really even an issue if your drunk enough that Korean starts to make sense.

****

Review: Bahama Breeze – Orlando FL

Overpriced, tropical-themed family restaurant specializing in making you realize how much of a glutton you really are by posting insane calorie counts near all their menu items. While I appreciate the honest disclosure of their entree’s heart-stopping power, the lack of commitment to providing any healthy and equally appealing menu items is disappointing. Especially given that the food is not especially great, I shouldn’t feel compelled to ask if the restaurant staff are trained in CPR or how to operate a defib unit. But let’s be honest, you came to this restaurant to slowly kill yourself. And the mood couldn’t be better set by the island cabana decor soaked in the sounds of a middle aged man who refuses to give up his 30-year old dream to be a musician. Excellent fruity cocktails.

**

Review: Motel 6 – Charleston SC

It was the cheapest option available and didn’t have any dog regulations. Walking in I could see why. There is very little the dog could do to make the room worse. It was clean and pretty spartan – the designers have clearly learned how to minimize risk based off of the typical motel 6 clientele. For example there are no drawers, which in hindsight seems more practical given the things I heard discussed by the other guests through the relatively thin walls. This is not the motel to take your sweetheart to unless you want to break up with her by telling her you want to start bringing scatplay into the bedroom. Though it appears as the the linens were freshly laundered, the bedspread had a couple small stains that are best not to dwell on. In summary: cheap, clean-ish, good enough if you just need a room to poop out some drug-filled balloons.

***