Meeting Minutes

Have you ever had that feeling during an important meeting like you’re not sure why you were all called together or why you are there? Like when you are called together for a meeting but then the organizer and everyone else you would normally recognize isn’t there, so you just sit there as a group and raise eyebrows at each other, wondering who everyone around the table is until someone finally says something like “well.. i’ll guess i’ll start us off.” Yeah. So long story short I walked into the wrong meeting room and accidentally took part in a meeting about frogs.

I wasn’t brave enough to step out of the meeting once we got going. Learned a lot.

Get me J.J. Abrams on line 1

I wish we had more mashup films like AVP or Freddy v. Jason, or at least some sequels that were willing to try something new. I can think of a couple dozen guaranteed hits right off the ol’ bean:

  1. Back to the Future / Terminator: Picture the T-1000 clinging to the back of the Delorean
  2. Big Lebowski / the Muppet Caper: The exact same movie but with muppets
  3. 90 minutes of Tom Cruise running / Speed
  4. Ken Burns: A Captain America Civil War
  5. Die Hard: Assisted Living Community
  6. James Bond cracks and turns into a villain – Jason Bourne tasked to bring him down.
  7. Shawshank Redemption, but they are all ghosts inside the Ghostbusters ghost storage facility.
  8. Christine / Fast and Furious
  9. Mrs. Doubtfire is The Fugitive
  10. The Jungle Book / Predator
  11. National Lampoons Addams Family Vacation
  12. Beetlejuice vs The Exorcist
  13. Bill & Ted phone booth breaks down in a concentration camp (serious)
  14. Con Air / Sully
  15. Conan the Barbarian Coming to America
  16. Edward Scissorhands / Barbershop
  17. Godfather vs. Godfather II
  18. Up / Gravity
  19. Gremlins / Waterworld
  20. 2001 / Her
  21. Highlander but the duels are face-melting guitar solos
  22. Indiana Jones and the Planet of the Apes
  23. Groundhog Day but from the perspective of Ned Ryerson, who is also trapped in the same day.
  24. Kong : Jurassic Park
  25. Two hours of Sean Connery working as a speech pathologist. First client: Stallone. Like a Finding Forrester for overcoming speech impediments

Love Magic

My wife is the strongest woman I know. In fact she’s a goddamn wild oak; steadfast and headstrong. Loyal and smart. Caring and kind, warm and quick to laugh with others. She can be loud; brash or intimidating some might say. Passionate about what she believes in and confident enough to always find her way. She makes friends easily and lives to see and be seen.

But what I really love about my wife is what doesn’t show on the surface. The things most people don’t get to see. The moments I’ve shared with her in private or amongst close friends over the last three (almost four) years I’ve known her when no one else was looking. Those moments when her confidence falters, or she seems unsure about what to do next. When she speaks softly in fumbled speech. When things around her fall apart. Those are the times I witness the real elegance and humility behind the eyes of my lioness.

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Nicole Frances “Beau” LeBeau is the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met. But most of the reasons I married her don’t show up on the surface. I love her for the grace and gallantry of a delicate balancing act she is performing before everyone, right before their eyes, without them knowing it. The act of facing every challenge with certainty. The act of taking every setback in stride. It’s a secret magic that only I can see, or rather, that she lets me see; with invisible strings and silver-glass columns holding her up, day after day. The magic of being both vulnerable and steady, smart and silly, wife and friend.

I am so happy to have the front row seat, now and forever. So happy to celebrate this first of many anniversaries.